Division

If I see one more person say "Well, what about black on black crime or when a black officer shoots a white man?!" I'm going to lose my mind.  Don't point fingers at wrongdoing and justify it with other wrongs.  Division is still division regardless of which side you're on. (Matthew 12:25 Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, "Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand.)  This was somebody's baby and somebody's daddy.  A very pregnant woman now has a husband that's in jail and charged with murder. Racism is as alive as ever, but this is the work of Satan himself. (The LORD said to Satan, "Where have you come from?" Satan answered the LORD, "From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.") Don't click your teeth and say "Well, he shouldn't have run.." (1 Corinthians 10:10 And do not grumble, as some of them did and were killed by the destroying angel.) Don't assume that whatever was in a man's past or whatever happens in the moment a reasonable excuse. Don't say "He should have just gotten the ticket like the rest of us." (Romans 2:1 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgement on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgement do the same things.) Satan came to kill, and he's busy at it.  DO NOT JUSTIFY IT. Black on black crime, white police officer shooting a 50 year old black man..every single time, it's the devil's works. (Romans 14:23 ...;and everything that does not come from faith is sin. John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy) Don't let Satan work in your heart and mind,  There is no "Well, if only he hadn't XYZ" or "The officer made a bad choice under pressure." No... (2 Corinthians 10:5  We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.)

MYOB

Why I think the "Not your baby, not your problem" argument is a bunch of baloney.

This is a defense used by a lot of people for a lot of reasons.  Breastfeeding & formula, cry-it-out, diaper choices, abortion, circumcision, and so on and so on.

I understand that parenting choices are personal, and that once a decision is made, most parents will stick to that choice and defend it.  But if the only reasoning they can give is that it's their baby and they can do whatever they want with it...well, is that an actual reason or even reasonable at all? 

I can formula feed my kid, it's not your concern.

I can let my baby cry it out, it's not your concern.

I can circumcise my baby, it's not your concern.

I can abort my baby, it's not your concern.

I can leave my baby in the car, it's not your concern.

I'm pro formula, and I'll admit to trying the CIO method.  So, in the infinite spectrum of choices, when does it actually become a concern for an outsider?

It blows my mind when those on pro-abortion or pro-circumcision sides use this excuse.  It's not MY baby they're squashing out of existence, so why should *I* care at all?  It's not MY son they're cutting for no medical reason, so why should *I* care?  Not long ago, it was perfectly legal to cut a baby girl's genitals, but enough people made it their problem and put a stop to it.  Should that have never happened??

If I saw a baby locked in a hot car, should I just walk away because it's not MY baby?  Should I respect that parent's choice even though I believe that child is in danger and being harmed by the parent's choice??  If I can show the parent that it is a widely accepted fact that leaving your baby in a car is not the best way to go and can be harmful, should I?  (circumcision information??)

When another person shows concern, it's not because they want to pick apart your life or be nosey.  It's because we believe a child is in danger, and we have a responsibility to advocate for that child.

The Breastfed vs. Formula Fed Debate!

I breastfed my first child and have plans to do the same with my second.  I was incredibly blessed in that I had zero problems with latch, supply, weight gain, or just having the time to do it.  I had support from my medical providers, my husband, and my entire family (and most of them had never breastfed).  I had become a stay at home mom, I was given a pump, I had access to assistance if I needed it.  All in all, it was pretty much a perfect setup.

But...  I have to say that towards the end of the time we breastfed, I was starting to get pretty fed up(pun!) with it.  I had a pump and bottles and could express enough milk, but she would not take a bottle.  It wasn't an issue with nipple size or flow.  Anytime a bottle would pass over her lips she would start screaming and gagging.  Night time feedings started to make me feel really trapped, and I couldn't leave her for more than an hour or so.  Dad was never able to comfort her.  I could hold her and rock and sing and do everything I could to soothe her, but she would not fall asleep without a boob in her mouth.  Nothing was good enough except for the boobs.  I understood it.  Comfort nursing and all that jazz.  But it got to a point where nursing would make me feel really, really resentful.  (why isn't my voice, touch, love enough for you?!)  So, I decided to wean her at 13 months.  It was surprisingly easy.  (we had the most success with toddler straw cups)

Breastfeeding had run its course, and we were better off moving on from it.  I am so grateful for the time that I did get to nurse.  I did enjoy it up until the end, and loved that I was physically capable of doing it.  I have no plans to do anything but nurse with #2.

I am pro-breast.  I am NOT, however, anti-anything-else.

I'm aware that some women are not able to nurse.  They are physically not able to do it.
I'm aware that some women choose not to nurse for various reasons.  Maybe they have no support.  Maybe they feel uncomfortable with the idea of nursing itself.  Maybe they have past traumas and nursing exacerbates those bad feelings.  Maybe they have to work and pumping didn't work for them.
I'm aware that some women just don't want to.  I wanted to.  I was able to, and it was awesome for over a year.  But I have personal, first hand experience with the "I don't want to do this" feeling.

Some people will insist that breastfeeding is best for babies and formulas are full of chemicals and whatnots.  I don't think breastfeeding will make your child invincible, more intelligent, or give them a stronger bond.  (breastfeeding =/= love)  I think it's certainly beneficial, but there are literally millions of healthy, smart, loving formula fed kids out there.  In the end, using breastmilk or formula is a teeny, tiny, minuscule factor in how your kid will turn out.  Both options are nourishing, safe, and can be done with 100% hardcore love.

If you want to breastfeed, and you are able, that's great!  If you want to formula feed, and you are able, that's great!

I think moms on either side are too quick to both judge another and be offended by another.  There is no reason to put down a mother's method of feeding her child or to take another mom's method as an insult.

Things to be upset over

• Babies that are not having their nutritional needs met because of a parent's personal opinion.
• Babies that are not treated with love and respect.
• Moms that force themselves into one option or another despite possible detriment to their own physical, emotional, and mental health.

circumcision, revisited!

I wrote about my reasons against circumcision already, but I want to redo it and expand on it a little.

Fast Facts!

• No major health organization in the world recommends routine circumcision.  
• Circumcision kills more neonatal boys than suffocation or care accidents, yet those deaths are nearly 100% preventable.
• The Bible does not recommend circumcision for Christians today.
• Every circumcised man has a circumcision scar.  They just might not realize it. 
• No circumcision method is “no-cut” and no anesthetic options provide complete numbness or pain relief.
• The same reasons people advocate for female circumcision are the same reasons many advocate for male circumcision.  (it’s cleaner, looks better, religious reasons, tradition, prevents diseases)

There is no reason to routinely circumcise healthy baby boys.  (or girls!)  Doctors take an oath swearing not to perform procedures that are unnecessary, yet many doctors (and only every medical organization on Earth) admit that routine circumcisions are not necessary.  Trusting your doctors and pediatricians is great, just make sure that they are actually trustworthy before you hand over your newborn to be disassembled.

There is no method of pain management that can completely numb a boy’s genitals for circumcision.  (aside from that, why anesthetize your baby if you don’t need to?)  Circumcision is painful.  Babies react with crying, entering a shock like state, and can even have heart and breathing problems.  Infections, botched procedures, or losing (even more) parts of the penis are also things to consider.  Even after the procedure is over, baby has an open wound that’s regularly exposed to urine, fecal matter, and the constant pressure and agitation of a diaper. Death is also a side effect.  That’s fact.

Circumcision is not a method of STD or infection prevention.   A little perspective - Vaginas are technically less “clean” than a penis and infections such as UTIs are much more common among women.  We don’t circumcise them (anymore), we just teach them proper hygiene and how to have safe sex.  When it comes to males, we jump to amputating body parts as a supposed preventative measure for an issue that may never arise.  Backwards and sexist.  As a woman, would you feel comfortable trusting a circumcised penis as your only form of sexual protection?

Tons and tons of people will say that “This guy I know that wasn’t circumcised” had horrible infections or this problem or that problem.  What these people either look over, or just don’t know, is that inaccurate care information for intact boys is everrryyywherrrre and persists to this day.  For the longest time, people believed that foreskins needed to be forcibly retracted and thoroughly cleaned inside and out with soaps.  This is bad and totally incorrect!  The foreskin is attached to the penis.  Forced retraction literally rips the tissues apart creating a painful open wound (much like circumcision?).  Doing it just once is asking for an infection.  Doing it daily is pretty much a guarantee.  Soap also has no business being anywhere near genitals, girls or boys.  It messes with PH and natural bacteria.  There is a reason soap burns in those places!   This incorrect info is still prevalent in the medical community, despite all the medical research showing the risks and harms.

Intact boys are not difficult to care for.  I’d even say that they’re the easiest out of baby girls and circumcised boys.  Firstly, there is no wound to care for.  Second, there are no folds or creases.  It’s like a finger…  You wipe it off and go!  Done.


Now on to the “personal preference” some people speak about.  I have to admit, these excuses really make me angry.  I can’t blame a parent for doing something they believe is safer or healthier for their child, especially if a medical professional has suggested it.  But when someone says they want to cut off bits of their child’s flesh for aesthetic reasons….ugh… I just get all itchy inside.

Boys don’t need to match their daddies.  They just don’t.  We will not surgically alter our daughter’s body to match mine, and we will not surgically alter our son’s body to match his father’s.  If your son has a smaller/larger penis than his father, would you try to shrink/grow it?  If it was a different color would you dye it?  If it leaned to the right instead of the left, would you strap it down?  Sounds ridiculous, huh?

I also dislike the “he will get picked on” excuse.  Who hasn’t been picked on?  Girls get picked on constantly for having small or large breasts.  We don’t surgically alter their breasts at birth.  We teach them that they are beautifully made and make great efforts to prevent and stop bullying.  If your child got teased for having a big nose or skinny legs or freckles would you have them altered?  All in hopes to appease the potential bullies?  And really, how often is your son going to be showing his penis to his peers?  Also, depending on where you live, intact may already be the overwhelming majority…  Circumcision rates continue to drop, so if you want your child’s genitals to be trendy, you should probably leave them natural.

I think it’s especially disgusting when parents express concern for future sexual partner’s preferences.  Cutting your child’s genitals because you think his future wife might like it better is just disgusting.  There is no other word for it.  If I had my daughter’s breasts enlarged or her labia trimmed because I thought her future husband might get turned on more, I’d go to jail.  Do not sexualize your infant.  Anyone that would base their most intimate relationships on physical appearance does not deserve to be in the same room as my child, must less in the same bed.

A Whole Christian

Found at savingsons.org

[Act 15:1-10 NIV] 1 Certain people came down from Judea to Antioch and were teaching the believers: "Unless you are circumcised, according to the custom taught by Moses, you cannot be saved." 2 This brought Paul and Barnabas into sharp dispute and debate with them. So Paul and Barnabas were appointed, along with some other believers, to go up to Jerusalem to see the apostles and elders about this question. 3 The church sent them on their way, and as they traveled through Phoenicia and Samaria, they told how the Gentiles had been converted. This news made all the believers very glad. 4 When they came to Jerusalem, they were welcomed by the church and the apostles and elders, to whom they reported everything God had done through them. 5 Then some of the believers who belonged to the party of the Pharisees stood up and said, "The Gentiles must be circumcised and required to keep the law of Moses." 6 The apostles and elders met to consider this question. 7 After much discussion, Peter got up and addressed them: "Brothers, you know that some time ago God made a choice among you that the Gentiles might hear from my lips the message of the gospel and believe. 8 God, who knows the heart, showed that he accepted them by giving the Holy Spirit to them, just as he did to us. 9 He did not discriminate between us and them, for he purified their hearts by faith. 10 Now then, why do you try to test God by putting on the necks of Gentiles a yoke that neither we nor our ancestors have been able to bear?

[Gal 5:1-12 NIV] 1 It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. 2 Mark my words! I, Paul, tell you that if you let yourselves be circumcised, Christ will be of no value to you at all. 3 Again I declare to every man who lets himself be circumcised that he is obligated to obey the whole law. 4 You who are trying to be justified by the law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace. 5 For through the Spirit we eagerly await by faith the righteousness for which we hope. 6 For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love. 7 You were running a good race. Who cut in on you to keep you from obeying the truth? 8 That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. 9 "A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough." 10 I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion, whoever that may be, will have to pay the penalty. 11 Brothers and sisters, if I am still preaching circumcision, why am I still being persecuted? In that case the offense of the cross has been abolished. 12 As for those agitators, I wish they would go the whole way and emasculate themselves!

[Gal 6:12-16 NIV] 12 Those who want to impress people by means of the flesh are trying to compel you to be circumcised. The only reason they do this is to avoid being persecuted for the cross of Christ. 13 Not even those who are circumcised keep the law, yet they want you to be circumcised that they may boast about your circumcision in the flesh. 14 May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world. 15 Neither circumcision nor uncircumcision means anything; what counts is the new creation. 16 Peace and mercy to all who follow this rule--to the Israel of God.

[Tit 1:10-11 NIV] 10 For there are many rebellious people, full of meaningless talk and deception, especially those of the circumcision group. 11 They must be silenced, because they are disrupting whole households by teaching things they ought not to teach--and that for the sake of dishonest gain.

[1Co 7:17 NIV] 17 Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.

[Phl 3:2-3 NIV] 2 Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh. 3 For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh--

[Col 2:8-14 NIV] 8 See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ. 9 For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, 10 and in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority. 11 In him you were also circumcised with a circumcision not performed by human hands. Your whole self ruled by the flesh was put off when you were circumcised by Christ, 12 having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through your faith in the working of God, who raised him from the dead. 13 When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, 14 having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross.

Child Leashes

I always thought child leashes were stupid..until I had a child and actually thought about it.

It irks me when I see other parents say things like "Leashes are for lazy parents...I use a stroller."  How different is a stroller, really??  It's a rolling baby cage that you strap your kid into.  And baby wearing is literally strapping a kid to your body. 

To me, lazy parenting is when people use these things inappropriately.  Like a parent using a leash being totally unaware that their child is destroying a store display six feet away.  Or worse, dragging the child like a rag doll.  Lazy parenting is when people leave their infants in a portable carseat for the ride to the store, the entire shopping trip, lunch, and the ride back home.  Lazy parenting is when people don't care enough about their child's safety and comfort to find an option that works for the whole family.

My preference is to babywear when they're small, hold hands when they're older, and bring a stroller as back up if there's lots of walking.  (Strollers are pretty much mall shopping carts with an extra bonus of being a place to nap)

I don't use a leash with my toddler because of her fascination with all things dog.  I can see it now...Put a leash on her in a busy store...and she immediately falls to her hands and knees and starts barking.  Hilarious, but not very useful.  Maybe baby #2 will be more human?

Leashes are not cruel.  It's not lazy.  It's not treating your kid like an animal.  It's just a different (but similar) option.

Productive-ness!!

I just cut up my first whole chicken!  Super proud of myself. Thanks to a couple YouTube how-to videos, it was pretty simple.

AND I made a cake. A mocha-gooey-fudge-homemade-buttercream-frosting type of cake.

I'm done for the day.